Shooting the sun

''The outsider'' is a book which talks about
the absurdity of life . The protagonist,Mersault, is
a person who is capable of feeling only physical things.
There is a lot more to explain than this, but
its worth mentioning here about one of the incidents in which
he kills a guy and the reason was because he had a knife in his
hand ,and the sun's light was getting reflected from it very strongly
which compelled him to kill that guy.Thats it.
while I don't suffer from any similar psychic disorder(as most of u would call it),
for some reasons I feel, sun might be ....whatever.
This one is continuation to "Right to Die" and acknowledgment
to Abhishek with whom I studied and discussed "The outsider".

Shooting the sun

My plea for the right to die
was rejected without a reason.
but crazy humans are just the puppets
The real culprit is,I think,the sun.

The sun gives the light
and the light gives the hope
the filthy game of life begins
and the soul begins to choke.

It keeps revolving round the earth
so pleased to see us under the bar
how can we trust someone anyways
who hides half a day and lives so far

but the loser sun doesn't know,
its fire is my road to freedom.
someday it has to come closer
and make the ashes burn.

but until then I must keep me alive
eclipsing its victory every morn
and let its fire grow everyday
with every bullet shooting the sun.

mehek of Phoenix

This time I had phoenix.Its Mauritian beer.For the uninitiated,

Mauritians have established themselves as the most vestigial

people on this planet, or amongst all homo sapiens in the entire

galaxy.they don't manufacture one goddamn thing themselves

except for beer(drinking which they have become even more useless).

Drinking this cheap brand , the cheap shaayar inside

me (Altaf Raja. further ref:kara B|| ) is raising voices.

This shaayari is an ode to the immortal Mauritians, Altaf Bhai,kara B|| and my

5th crush( u can use an exponential function on this variable) ,

Mehek Mathur, a cute girl from my previous job

(not necessarily in this order).

If she ever reads this stuff ,which I feel is a bloody inspiration

from the all the fucking pathetic shaayaris I have heard

during IIT Days(again thanx to kara B||), she will forgive me in the

light of my eternal love for her and the mauritian beer effect.

ruh se nikali har saans mein sirf teri hi mehek hogi

is toote dil ke sheeshey mein sirf teri hi jhalak hogi

daaman chhodaane se pehle socha to hota

meri khawahishon ki kabr mein kahin teri yaad bhi to dafan hogi.

Right to Die

The clock stroke twelve,and the trial began

I pleaded for death and began to explain.

"without a fault I have been made to live

and it may be wrong to die but to live is insane.

The problem with my life

is my problem with the life

perennially trapped in this vicious circle,

every conscious moment is a pain to survive.

I was born without a choice,

but let death give me one.

how long I have to fight this battle,

either way to loose in this already lost run"

But the life and the logic

have seldom worked together.

the lawyer of the life

is also the one with right to order.

The nib did not break and the verdict was read

"every moment that u wish not to exist,

your life grows longer by a second,

never out of the circle,i would insist".

And as I moved handcuffed in the darkroom

with my shadow fading away with each cry

I could hear someone talking faraway

The obligation to live ,and the right to die.

A second before I die

okey... I am 3 beers down and it reminds me somehow of 3 doors down..

This one comes from 3rd kingfisher bottle...

one more day to the week
the reasons to live still so bleak
my skin ripping out of body
kill me before i freak.

some live and some die for some
thats what they think as they continue in oblivion
they all lie to themselves
as its always nobody and none.

its a game ,u would not know
so will not I
until a death is blessed,
a second before i die.